mike and the mechanics

You remind me of my jeep
I wanna ride it
Something like my sound
I wanna pump it
Girl you look just like my car
I wanna wax it
And something like my bank account
I wanna spend you baby

Do you remember these words by R. Kelly? It begins to unlock the secrets as to why men cheat. What the hell is Chichi on about you’re probably asking. Well, allow me to expatiate. Or at least give it a shot.

A man won’t cheat on you because he doesn’t love you. Never make that mistake women. I know you may never understand this notion or maybe more appropriately, never understand how we can even offer this notion but more often than not, he loves you. Plenty. Before I go off course though, let me get back on track. I was about to remix this blog and turn it to something else but I must not lose focus. Will blog on that later. Now to business.

As I was saying, your man does love you. Like the R. Kelly song, you remind him of his jeep. And you know a man loves his jeep! You might not see the similarity or even feel insulted by the insinuation of such absurd lunacy (http://abzerd.blogspot.com/ holla) but just let Blog Sexy do what it do baby. Yeah! Okay. I apologize. That was uncalled for. Moving ahead. Hip hop style.




















You’re his BRIGHT EYED GIRL like HALOGEN HEADLAMPS
He loves the sound of your VOICE like it’s from SUPERCHARGED AMPS
Loves the texture of your SKIN like some plush ITALIAN LEATHER
Likes you with your TOP DOWN but that depends on the weather
He loves to TURN YOU ON, keys to IGNITION
Take you where you need to go when he works that TRANSMISSION
But always SAFETY first so you know he stays STRAPPED
Before he takes you from 0-60, 3 seconds flat
WAX that body down, strictly the best for you
Keep you ROLLING down boulevards in them SHINY SHOES
Take you everywhere, show you off to all his friends
They love yo THICK BODY like that wide bodied BENZ
The way you RIDE smooth, carry that BADUNKADUNK
How you don’t flip over with so much junk in the TRUNK
Go under yo HOOD and JUICE you in the right spots
Work you all night then rest you in the PARKING LOT

Well, it wasn’t the initial plan to drop 16 but I kinda got a strong buzz and ran with it. Pity it’s such a wack verse but it does get the picture across. Well, sorta. It’s a cheap attempt at linking a female with a car but I just felt it would go down better than in essay form. Anyway, moving on.

So what does this have to do with men cheating? Well, when we do the comparison of woman and whip, a hurt chick is a faulty car. So, I now realize I didn’t structure this too well but I’m tired now and here’s the point of all this rubbish:

If chicks are cars, then dudes are mechanics because no matter how much they screw you over, you just keep going back. It could be to complain about faulty service, the car is always jerking, something is leaking, something wasn't put in properly, he left a dent on the body or most especially, why can’t he ever just do what he was asked to? Why fix one problem only to create another? At which point she is likely to scream, I am never bringing my car here again! With ‘again’ being next week’s tune-up!

That's why men cheat, ok?

Now I’m off to bow my head in shame
For posting a blog that is so lame

Goodnight everybody!